I now have two 20 year-old children – when did that happen?

It cannot be. I am still young at heart, but the guy in the mirror whose face I shave seems to be not so young. But, now it is official. I have my second twenty-old child. But, I was just in college and starting my first job. How did I get older so quickly? I mean I still get acne for Christ’s sake. I do have one more who is only 16, but she will begin the college visit process in three months. Yikes.

I think today is a reminder that we are mortal and do not get a “do over.” We can change our path forward, but trust me young folks, it is going forward. Yet, we cannot look in the mirror too long. We need to enjoy our children and experiences. We should still pursue those dreams and embark on those journeys. We should journey down the paths and make new ones. I have found a wonderful set of kindred spirits on WordPress and other blogs who seem to have the same things keeping them up at night, but relish in the laughter of friends and families. I love to read their stories and anecdotes and reflect on their pictures. I get to be a mental traveler that way.

In six weeks, I will become the speed limit in age. Like Sammy Hagar, I may not be able to drive 55, but that will be the mileage on this old body. My gosh, I can start a pension. But, that cannot be me. I just had my first child. Then another, then a third. We celebrated my second son’s birthday before he headed to college, so the day of his real birthday has given me a chance to ponder. I have done some things wrong. I have done some things I could have done better. But, I lucked up and did some things right.

My bride has put up with me for 28 years, 29 if you count the year of dating. She is easily the better half. We have three wonderfully eclectic and interesting children who get along with each other. Our biggest rule is we must be civil to each other. Plus, they get along with (or tolerate) each other’s friends. There are a few strident personalities in the mix of friends, but my children learn to ying and yang with them. I heard my daughter tell one of her friends when we bumped into one of my oldest son’s friends at a festival, “you handled him well. You just don’t want to argue with him.”

For the most part we have our health. I still have to take a couple of pills to make sure the body works reasonably well, but we have been fortunate on the physical health side. I am excited for my kids. One is a rising senior in college and the second is a rising sophomore. I love when they do stuff on their own without a parent’s instigation. I love it when they tell you they have done something that is the right thing. I am working from home now in my current job and it lets me see this wonderful young person who is my daughter more. She is funny, smart and caring. Yes, she is a teenager, but the upside is well ahead of the downside.

On my son’s birthday, I wish everyone well. I wish the very best for him. He is man of many interests. That is cool. Happy birthday, Mr. D. Have a great sophomore year at college. Learn much. Have fun. Confirm or find your passions. Life is your oyster.



12 thoughts on “I now have two 20 year-old children – when did that happen?

  1. Why you’re just a young whippersnapper! 55? phw! I think the 50’s are the best decade.
    I also think that people who haven’t had children have missed all those little reminders of age creeping up. It happens to us in huge, glaring surprises, like the first AARP ad showing up in the mailbox, like people holding doors open and waiting with infinite patience until you finally get it through your head that they are being polite to you, their elder. (Huh? How did that happen) And, like when you look around and discover that your doctor has ceded his practice to his smooth cheeked son, your tax man is half your age, and your neighbors have such painfully unblemished skin that you want to go hide your gnarly old leather in a sack.

    • Why thank you. I have not been called a young whippersnapper in quite a few moons. Since I refuse to sign up for AARP, they send me a monthly reminder. To me, this tells me they make too much money off their customers. You are right about the kids. Take care, BTG

  2. Time really does goes by too quickly. My oldest daughter just had her 9th birthday, and that night before bed, my husband looked at me and said, “Our baby is 9!” We still remember bringing her home from the hospital and wondering what in the heck we were supposed to do with her, and when she was 3 months old, we used to joke and ask her when she was going to college. Now we don’t ever want her to leave, but time won’t slow down.

    • Emily, it is both sad for us and exciting for them to go off and discover new horizons. But, I loved it when they were small and so inquisitive. I just got back from my Mom’s house and she has lots and lots of grandchildren pictures around, so it was nice to revisit some of my kids’ pictures. Never miss a chance to hug them, or in the case of my boys as teenagers, get a fist bump or some ritual handshake. Take care, BTG

      • For boys it is a journey into manhood. There are steps forward and the inevitable step back. I read where boys don’t fully mature until they’re age 29. Some never get there. Thanks again, BTG

  3. I’m not sure, but I think I got trapped in the vacuum of your rush to 55! Yesterday I was 28 and this morning I awoke to 53. There must be an invisible whirlpool sucking us all in! HELP! Someone throw e a lifeline quick!!!

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