Friday funnies – an encore

Since I am expecting some tree folks any minute to take down a dead pine tree, let me repost an encore of an earlier post.

Earlier this week, attending a funeral of a good friend’s mother allowed us to catch up with many high school and college friends. Stories abounded, so here are a few to get a smile, a laugh or a surprise. No one was harmed during these stories or their retelling.

When a couple of friends visited me in Atlanta, one forgot his walking shoes. I lent him my brand new pair which molded to his feet, not mine. It took several wearings a to remold them to my feet.

While taking baseball batting practice, the pitcher wondered why I was laughing at the plate. Behind him in the outfield were two friends who knew I liked hard rock music. They were hopping toward each other doing air guitars as some guitarists would do on stage.

Three friends roomed together as young adults. One observed the birdlike first names of the girlfriends of the other two. He noted, one is dating Robin, the other is dating Lark. It looks like I will need to find a girl named CON-dor, emphasizing the first syllable.

I mentioned we often hung out at the house of my friend’s mother (who just passed away). Late one evening, she told her son to remember to take out the garbage. But, he soon was out like a light. Since my ride home was now asleep and I lived just a 1/2 mile away cutting through yards, I locked up, took the trash out to the curb and walked home. He called me the next day to ask how the trash got out.

This same friend worked briefly at a bank branch. While on the phone with a customer, the branch was held up at gunpoint. The robber told everyone to hit the floor. My friend slowly starting to get down without hanging up. The robber shouted at him “, I said hit the floor!” He said he was grabbing some carpet. Ironically, the person on the phone heard this and called the police, who arrested them outside.

One of the two classmates who rides herd over our high school reunion was ragging a friend who has only been to one early on. She teased him that he vaguely resembles our classmate. The real reason he does not attend is his wife teased him unmercifully about his ex-girlfriends fawning over him.

One set of friends got married and adopted a Korean boy as they had troubling conceiving. When he was a toddler, he was pitching a fit in a grocery checkout line with his red-haired mother. My blond haired friend had left the line to get a forgotten item. As he hustled back, other patrons expected to see an Asian-American husband. As they looked puzzled, the father said to all, “he is adopted.”

Finally, the funeral mass was in the church where we attended Midnight Mass. The contemporary folk choir inspired us high schoolers so much, we would go out and sing carols at 1 am waking up friends. Some did not appreciate our holiday spirit.

There are so many more stories, but I hoped you enjoyed these few. Have a great weekend.


20 thoughts on “Friday funnies – an encore

  1. Note to Readers: We grew up in city which had a bridge with toll booths. Being young and foolish, I have three stories of those toll booths.

    – one baseball game, we were coming back home and all of us had our pants and wallets in the trunk, as we were still in our uniforms. We got to the toll bridge and had no money in the car. So, we saw some teammates in the car behind us and one of us ran back – they had no money either.
    – when we did have money (it was 25 cents), the passenger would try to do a hook shot across the car to the toll basket; the driver would have a spare quarter if the passenger missed.
    – finally, sad to say, when we did not have money, it was not uncommon to follow the car in front through – yes that was a bad thing to do; but we were young and foolish.

    • Janis, thanks for your comment. They are doing the small pruning now and will do the pine trees tomorrow. I got as much as I could done, but needed them for some tall shrubbery/ trees. Thanks for the well wishes. Keith

  2. What a fun way to start Friday off! Thanks, Keith! My favourite is the one about your friends doing air guitar antics behind the pitcher, making you laugh! I can picture it in my mind!

    • Jill, thanks. It was funny. I hope Clive, David and Roger see that one as they may get a kick out of it. By the way, one of the guys was the guy I lent my new tennis shoes to in the earlier story. Keith

      • David and Clive likely will, but Roger is in his tower at the moment and only dropping by intermittently … don’t worry, he’ll be okay. Ha ha … somehow I had already figured that!

  3. thanks for the chuckles Keith.
    so laughing
    they are all good but this one struck me:
    “He noted, one is dating Robin, the other is dating Lark. It looks like I will need to find a girl named CON-dor, emphasizing the first syllable”.

    • Cindy, our Condor friend had the biggest laugh and his voice would carry. He is was in the backseat as three of us were headed to some intramural flag football game at the Y. The driver and I were talking about the JV basketball team at our school whose coach had the last name of Poore. So, as we talked, the boisterous one of us was listening in the back. I said they would be doing better if they did not have Poore (meaning poor) coaching. The two of us in the front seat chuckled. About twenty seconds later we hear this roar of laughter from the backseat yelling “Poore coaching.” It was hysterical that it took those extra few seconds for the pun to sink in.

      One of things about good friends is everyone is fair game for teasing, me included. Keith

  4. Note to Readers: Old Betsy gave many a ride to four close friends. None of us would ever be accused of being a good singer, but we would belt out in four part harmony “Country Roads” to John Denver on the radio or “Brickhouse” to Lionel Ritchie and the Commodores.

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