One of my favorite bosses had a unique way of not saying something bad about another person, while getting his point across. He would say about the person who consistently wronged others, “Of all the people in the world, he certainly is one of them.”
This comment would draw the appropriate chuckle. I mention this as name calling and insulting folks are becoming too much the norm. Civil discourse is increasingly rare. It is important to respond to some criticism, but do so without stooping to the level of the offender, who is baiting you. And, sometimes it is best not to respond at all.
A good example is arguing with folks like Donald Trump. He wants a mud fight, as his arguments are so poor. He would rather engage in a Twitter fight, so he can feign being insulted and attack back. Plus, with only 140 characters, it is easier for him to call someone the devil, crooked, stupid, weak, loser, ugly, etc. than actually debate points. Like many narcissists, he has a hard time seeing his role in the argument.
The best thing to do with folks like a Trump is push back with civil disagreement. I have said before being politically incorrect does not give anyone the right to lie or be a jerk. It does not give anyone the right to name call or demean people. A disarming comment is to say “I understand your points, but do not agree with them.” This works with many who feel if you just understood their arguments, you would agree with them, so it is an unnerving comeback.
Yet, when faced with such a mean-spirited and divisive person, we cannot be silent. Trump is relentless in his attacks and uses a false bravado that carries more weight than it should. My grandmother said the louder someone shouts, the worse his argument. Also, be very respectful of quiet strength. My grandfather said little and rarely raised his voice, but you listened when he talked.
We must stick to the issues and when Trump attacks with venom, focus on the attack and push back with data and conviction. His attack on Muslim American parents who lost a son in Iraq was not only wrong and spiteful, it also revealed extremely poor judgment that he actually thought it was a good idea to attack a family who lost a son fighting for our country. Yet, that is the nature of the man, as for some reason, he will not argue points, but prefer to attack the person making the arguments.
There is one thing for certain, a President is going to hear a great deal of dissent, so temperament and judgment are key attributes, that this candidate seems to lack. And, a final piece advice he should heed is when you dig yourself a hole, stop digging.