Going to a movie these days requires a microloan. With the price of tickets, the obligatory overfilled popcorn and two huge drinks that you need two hands to hold, a movie date runs US$40 or more. Once you are settled in your seats, you are tempted by movie trailers of future movies, which you and your date will comment on regarding the relative merits of seeing each.
One of the disappointments in going to the movies is seeing one for which you had high expectations, but it falling flat. Some comedies will have their only funny scenes in the trailers. Once you see the movie, you realize that you had already seen its Sunday best and could have saved yourself $40. Or, you may select one based on the cast of stars, only to realize that familiar faces cannot perfume a pig. Or, it may be based on a favorite novel or TV show, and leave you lacking.
At the risk of offending those who liked these movies, a few that come to mind are as follows. If you agree or disagree, please do not hesitate to reiterate or challenge my opinion. Maybe, I need to give some a second look. But, note I prefer plot and dialogue in movies. Action movies are fine, but they need to have a story somewhere within.
August, Osage County – This movie had all the making of a great film, with Meryl Streep, Julia Roberts and Chris Cooper leading a very good cast. Yet, unless you like dysfunctional families that are not very endearing, screaming at each other for the duration of the movie, you might want to pass.
Breakfast at Tiffany’s – The original version starred Audrey Hepburn (who I adore) and George Peppard as two people who made a habit of leeching off other people. So, it was hard to pull for these less than endearing people. Yet, what made this movie voted the second most racist movie of all time is Mickey Rooney playing an over the top Asian-American man who lived in the upstairs apartment. For younger folks, Rooney is not Asian and his portrayal of this character was offensive. The movie highlight is the introduction of the song “Moon River.”
Austin Powers Films – I generally like Mike Myers, but I must confess my wife is not a huge fan. But, at the recommendation of Bob, a good friend, who said we must see this movie, we shelled out our $40. About halfway through the movie, my wife looks at me and says “I am going to kill Bob.” I know many liked this series of movies, but it was way too childish for my tastes. I may get some pushback on this one, but we stopped at one Austin Powers movie.
Tarzan, the Ape Man – I hesitated to put this on the list, as several guys went with me to see Bo Derek (of the movie “Ten”) tell the Tarzan story from Jane’s perspective. We should have known better, so technically it could have been left off this list. After a few minutes you realize that her beauty cannot overcome a very terrible movie. We should have also realized the movie “Ten” was good because of Dudley Moore’s bumbling comedy, not Derek’s ten-like looks.
A Bridge Too Far – This movie was not horrible, but it had one of the largest, most elite casts I have ever seen. It had the makings of a great, blockbuster film. It is a WWII movie about a failed mission, which should have been a clue to the producers. It just meandered through to an unexciting end. If it came up for free access, I may watch it to see if I missed something, but would not spend money to rent it.
The Razor’s Edge – One of the most poorly titled movie’s ever, starring Bill Murray. This movie left you nowhere near the edge of your seat as it plodded along. Even though it is based on the novel by W. Somerset Maugham, it left me wanting so much more. Since that was the theme of the book, maybe wanting more from the movie was a goal, which was successfully met.
Please offer up some of your disappointments. I recognize movie disappointments do not compare well to the problems in our world, but please look at this as a diversion.